onepassionfruit

My last post was over a year ago.   So many things can change in just one year.  Transitional moves like Love to Hate to Love.  Crowded to Alone to Surrounded.  Oklahoma to Texas to Michigan.  Independent to Alone to Dependent.   I can keep going, but why?  First, no none really knows what all that means. Just me. Just the memories swirling around in a person's head.  The point is, it's been quite a while since I've  put the pen to the paper.  Many times I've thought about sharing, but I just didn't.  (Also, I was too cheap to buy internet for myself and you need the internet to blog.)  That's too bad, though, for me.  Maybe not others. It's been really hard lately dealing with my grandmother.  She's 95 now.  I reread my "I Don't Know" post that I wrote last year the day before my birthday.  Life in Lawton I know now, is easy.  Slow, but easy.  Time brings clarity.  Reading that was a little bittersweet because now I'm not with my gr

That's the words that were ringing tonight at what I was expecting to be a reprieve from all the madness I keep experiencing.  You see, I'm a square dancer.  I'm a court reporter.  I'm a caretaker.  I'm a musician. I'm a really big dreamer.  Lately, I feel like a loser.   So no matter how well-meaning everyone was, going to our club dinner and having everyone ask, "Where do you work at now?", well, it just sucked. Tomorrow is my 48th birthday and I'm still here with my grandmother helping her out.  Or is she helping me out.  I tell you, when I first arrived here from El Paso, I was not me.  It was such a horrible time in my life. My whole world had crumbled and here I was in a situation I'd never dream of, of having to take care of my 91-year-old grandmother who, as it turned out, was not the grandmother I had always thought she was.  I guess that can go both ways.  Maybe I ended up changing to her and she could say the same thing about me. I

Sometimes I wonder about myself.  I don't know what it is, but during my daily routine when things happen, they're very entertaining. I went to San Diego on Thursday.  Yuppers, flew from Lawton again.   Yes, Lawton's flights get cancelled all the time.  It's not the outgoing flight that's the problem, but the return flight.  Which, yeah.  It did.  It got cancelled on the way back from this trip, also.   However, this time they gave me a hotel.  Usually, I end up spending the night in the airport.  Three times I've done that.  Not cool. Not cool at all.  You'd think I would have learned by now, nope.  Plus, the airport is sooo convenient distancewise so I keep going back for more.  So, yes, I did it again. I flew from Lawton. I'm on the 10:10 morning flight. Boarding time is 9:40.  We're good.  No worries. I got this.  I did have a busy night getting ready with all the normal stuff, plus throwing in an online test to add to the stress level.   Who

This is a leap year.   Big things can happen in leap years.  Odd things.  Rare things.  Sometimes they're great. Sometimes not. Presidential elections happen in leap years.  That could be a blessing or a curse.  Depends on what side of the fence you're on.  Or wall, even. It's also an Irish tradition that women propose to their man on Leap Day.  I read about that on the internet. Apparently, St. Brigid was given the Luck O' the Irish from Ole St. Patrick to "ALLOW" women to propose one day a year every four years.  Thanks for the permission.  I think I'll pass. That's the news I read today on the internet.  That and the Oscars hullabaloo.  Not much.  Well, wait.  I did just get a message that 5 Hour Energy received a judgment against 6 Hour Power for up to 22 million.  Now that's some news.  Especially, knowing that back in the day I took the depositions of the top Founder and CEO of  5 Hour Energy.  It makes my head big knowing that my care

It's another year.  I hope this year brings the things I have always hoped for.  Don't we all? It's somewhat bittersweet for me this week.  I'm celebrating a birthday on Wednesday.  It should be my 47th.  Not a major number.  No biggie.   But I'm skipping my birthday this year.  I hope no one remembers it.  Although, I've just ruined that because I'm blogging about it.  To some it may seem silly, but to me it's not.  My aunt already sent me a card.  She put "47" on it.  I cringed. A year and a half ago my older brother turned 47.  It was a Tuesday.   I remember we were in a very busy trial at that time and I texted him that morning.  "Happy Birthday, Bro!  I love you."  "Thank you," he texted. Those were the last words I'd ever see or hear from him.  At least I told him I loved him.  He died four days later on a Saturday.  I had lost my dream job that month.  My brother lost his life. He went paint balling that

I'm telling ya, I'm pretty disappointed.  But what do ya do?   My granny and I go to the Salvation Army looking around on Saturday.  Actually, we go almost every Saturday.   It's her favorite thing to do on her "Day".  Right there when you first walk in, there's this little chair sitting there.  A little one, all taped up with what looks like packing tape on the seat and other places.  But overall, it's a pretty sturdy little thing and so, so cute.  So original.  It's marked $9.99.  As if they're fooling me with that.  It's 10 bucks.  Yup.  Can't fool me. "How much will you take for that chair?"   "$2.00." "Really!  I'll take it."   "Okay." I leave it there and continue shopping.  BIG MISTAKE!!   Who knew!   I'm shopping.  I'm on the phone telling my brother about this chair and all the wonderful things I'm going to do with it.  I even named it my Charlie Brown chair.  Kin